The Great Closet Excavation

Well, this shall therefore be called "A Weekend of Milo."  We are laboring for the next few days over our baby boy, preparing the nursery for his December arrival.  And I can't wait!  Especially since my job seems to be to watch everyone else do the work.

We did, however, celebrate a milestone yesterday, after hours of hard work by Nate and his brother Chad.  We now have, for the first time ever in our married life, a joint closet.  Which means that for the last five and a half blissful years, I have kept a walk-in closet to myself, while my poor baby had to walk to the former office closet (now Milo's room), to get his clothes every morning.  Justice has been served.

I found quite a variety of lovely things as I cleaned out my closet.  First of all, I discovered that a lot of my regular clothes that I was positive I could wear through the pregnancy no longer fit over my giant rack.  Nate loves it; I can't wait to be back to clementine-size.

Second, I realized that, along with the "Michael Jackson pants" (Nate's phrase) I gave to Goodwill a few years ago (okay, and those were awesome pants - black, satin motorcycle pants with zippers up the front of the legs), I should also have added a few items:

1.  Red feather boa.  In fact, this went straight into the trash, because no one else should be tricked into the opportunity.  And honestly, I'll be so ashamed if I ever see a hooker or homeless person in those Michael Jackson pants, either...

2.  Black, studded belt.  Nate and I agreed that because I will be 30 next year, am about to be a mother, and have never been a biker, it might be time to let go of it.

3.  Floor-length, gold-stitched housecoat.  I have always thought I looked truly stunning in this.  Nate referred to me as "Carl" (a very proud African American man who would come to church in full tribal attire) every time I wore it.

4.  Light blue tulle Fairy Princess skirt.  I am neither a fairy nor a princess.  I considered hanging on to this for our "Peanut Festival," but then decided that something red, trashy, and satin would be much more appropriate.

5.  Approximately 17 pairs of men's tube socks, formerly worn to soccer practices over my shin guards along with a full face of makeup.  Should I play again next summer, I'm just going to splurge for the actual soccer socks.

As I cleaned, I realized that I've been hanging on to the remains of a wardrobe somewhat like a costume closet, the very thing for which I mocked a poor housewife on a touching episode of What Not to Wear.  It's time to be a grown-up and get ready for my little Peanut, coming soon to a Lufkin near you.