You have been a true and loyal friend, but you and I aren't the same people we once were. I have other priorities in my life, and my very own child, so you can't substitute anymore. And let's face it, I haven't been able to give you the love and attention you've deserved. You've been scratched and dropped, and several times I've knocked you senseless. You need better than that. I think it's time we parted ways.
Don't let it seem like I'm not heartbroken about this. You've entertained me through many a sleepless night or a long work conference. You gave me priceless treasures like Words With Friends (and its new sibling Hanging With Friends), Hal Higdon's Marathon Training, and Pocket Sword. I discovered, and discarded, Facebook along with you, and pinning with Pinterest has been a treat with us hand in hand. You taught me how to play Sudoku, for which I will be eternally grateful.
Oh iPhone, AT&T charges a ridiculous rate for you, and our new phone plan offers such cheaper service. You have been an expensive and distracting habit, and so I must bid you adieu, dear friend. After today, you will be neutered to function as an iPod Touch, so at least you can stay in the family. I will always look back fondly on our days together and wish you all the best.