Friday, January 29, 2016

Welcome to my world.

Have you ever tried to understand the mind of  two-year old?

Lucy has been having a hard time with naptime and bedtime. I understand. Why go to sleep when there is so much to be done (or, in her case, played with)? But understanding doesn't make it any less infuriating...

I walked Lucy back to her bed several times today when she was supposed to be lying down for her nap. I thought she had finally gone to sleep when I heard a huge commotion coming from her room. I was rolling out bread dough, so it took me a minute to get my hands washed and the dough set to the side (there was no screaming, so I took this luxury), and when I went in, I realized the commotion had come from Lucy climbing up her dresser and turning her fan so it was blowing away from her.

I started to ask Lucy why she had done this, when I noticed she was curled up in her bed, completely naked. Not a stitch of clothing on that child. She looked at me calmly and said, "Mommy, I had to take all my clothes off because I pee-peed in my underpants." (Does this make sense?)

"Lucy Jane, why in the world did you pee-pee in your underpants? You know where the bathroom is!"

And as serious as all get-out she told me, "Mommy, I went into the bathroom and the stool was on the potty, so what was I supposed to do?" I am not joking. These exact words came out of my two-year old's mouth.

It's true, the stool was on the potty because I had mopped a little while before. But in my mind, taking the stool off the potty was a lot less work than peeing in her undies, removing all of her clothing, and then scaling the dresser completely naked to turn the fan from blowing on her. Am I just not on board with her brilliant plan here?

And just to let you know what I'm dealing with on all fronts here...

Milo, who speaks better than most adults I know, loves to talk nonsense. He makes up words and sounds and just endlessly makes noise. Today, as he sat in the tub, he said something to the effect of, "Blabbity blabbity boogety sh*t."

I raised an eyebrow at him and asked, "Milo, what did you just say?"

To which he responded, "It's okay, Mommy, I just said sh*t."

EXCUSE ME????????

I responded as calmly as possible, "Milo, that is a completely inappropriate word. Where did you hear that?"

"I didn't hear it anywhere, Mommy. I just made it up. Why? What does it mean?"

Sigh of relief that no one is cussing in front of him, and then I calmly explained that it was inappropriate and I had better not hear it ever again or I would wash it out of his mouth with soap. I think I got my point across...

So, Happy Weekend!

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