Warning: sappy content to follow

Psalm 57:9-10 (The Message translation)
“I'm thanking you, GOD, out loud in the streets, singing your praises in town and country. The deeper your love, the higher it goes; every cloud is a flag to your faithfulness.”

We all have days when we are positive that the Creator of the Universe is out to get us. I recently went through a season so horrific, so filled with pain that words fail to accurately describe it, except to say my heart literally, physically hurt. Most days I didn’t want to get out of bed, and when it was all over, I was genuinely angry with God for not acting in the way I thought He should have. You couldn’t have convinced me for a second that God loved me, not after what he allowed to happen.

And honestly, He could have stopped what happened. But had He done so, I would have missed the opportunity to see Him turn a disgusting, heart-wrenching situation around into something that showed how huge He is and how small I am. I would have missed the chance for Him to display what true freedom and healing mean, not just for me, but also for others. And I would have missed getting to know a Father who holds me firm when all hell breaks loose. I would have missed out on even a tiny understanding of the immensity of His love for me.

The Psalmist David wrote about this love while he hid from King Saul in a cave, in the middle of the wilderness, trying to avoid a man bound and determined to kill him. Not exactly the kind of circumstances that make you want to lift up your hands and sing praises, right? Because, like me, David had done nothing wrong, but was still suffering from the choices of others. And yet he chose to turn his focus elsewhere, reminding himself that God’s love is always true. Others may fail and desert you. They may disappoint you or break your heart. In fact, they probably will. And while all this is happening, God’s love for you multiplies.

Take the love that you feel the most deeply, the most passionately, and multiply it by a hundred. Powerful, right? Well take that and now multiply it by a thousand. Even better, multiply it by a million… a billion… ten trillion. Dizzy yet? Can you even comprehend the intensity of that emotion? Because that doesn’t even touch the depth of the love God has for you. It’s as close as I can come to explaining what “the deeper [God’s] love, the higher it goes” really means (Ps.57:9). Every time you think you understand just a snippet of God’s love, you dip your toes into the vast ocean of what He truly feels.

I, for one, am humbled by this astounding thought. God adores me. And believe it or not, whether you acknowledge it or not, God adores you, too. No matter what you do, God loves you enough that you should start singing and dancing in the streets about it.

And so, just for the sake of reminder, I think it’s worth repeating. You might even want to say it out loud, and I recommend you allow yourself the luxury of a little smile.

God adores me.

Feels good, doesn’t it?

Kiss your nap goodbye

I can't stop falling asleep on our couch. And let me clarify. I mean our big, brand-new, smooshy, cozy, wonderful scarlet couch. Oh, it's fabulous, and there's nothing like the sound of the television to lull me into the perfect nap, curled up under my Jehovah blanket (a present from my mom) and buried amongst at least three giant pillows. I'm getting sleepy just thinking about it.

And until last night, I thought Nate was pleased when I fell asleep. I mean, I do get up a full two hours earlier than him, with plenty of time to run at least 3 or 4 miles, care for the dogs, shower, have my quiet time, iron clothes and make lunch, all before he cracks a peeper.  And a nap does mean that he can watch at least a single program in peace, without my incessant chatter and need for attention.

But I was wrong. He likes me awake, which honestly, delights me.  And so, today, I vow to sit upright on that delightful sofa, snack in hand and water near to keep me alert.  I will resist the urge to close my eyes, and give Kirstie Alley's Big Life my full attention.  No matter how much my body wants to lie down, my mind will refuse to accomodate it.  That's right, kids.  I'm going to suck it up. 

Naptime is over.

The Easter Hat (part II)

And if you thought I left Nate out of the fun, you're wrong.  That would just be cruel.  Almost as cruel as it would be to hold back this amazing thug moment from my faithful readers.  So I had to show you...

Celebrating both the Resurrection and my dear brother Mikey Jay, here's Nate's Easter hat.

Now after seeing both pictures, don't we make a fine pair?  Look for the Jackson Two, coming soon to a church service near you.

The Easter Hat (part I)

Just in case you're wondering, yes, I do still subscribe to the theory that all delightful young ladies (like myself) deserve new clothes for Easter every year. Perhaps I was somewhat spoiled as a child? 

In that spirit, I'd like to celebrate this year with a special little something... 

Ladies and gentlemen, my Easter hat.

Another four-day week

The weekend is never long enough, and I'm already wondering what I'm going to do next week when I can no longer coach myself out of bed in the morning with thoughts of, "It's okay, it's just a four-day week."  Because that fact is providing my sense of sanity and fairness today - that I don't have to work on Friday.  Thank you, Easter, and thank you everyone for calling a Friday off of work exactly what it is - Good Friday.  Now please don't think I'm not astounded by what Jesus truly did for us, but I really will be celebrating a little extra from the quiet coziness of my own bed.  I'm jolly already just thinking about it.  Hallelu-yer.

Add to everything wonderful about a short week the fact that I get to teach Lord of the Flies to my 10th graders and A Raisin in the Sun to my 9th grade girls. I'm just going to say it.  YIPPEE!!!!!  Yippee for teaching literature in an English class.  Just for fun.

So last night was grooming night at the Jackson house.  While I bathed Berkley (who grows bigger every single day) and Bella, Nate gave Bruiser a little haircut.  The mess on the kitchen floor looked exactly like what comes of a sheep being shorn.  Awww, little Bruiser, the (literal) black sheep of the family.  He was such a trooper, and after all of that, his reward was... a bath.  He loves them - he is a poodle, after all. 

Happy Monday, everyone!

When did Friday get here?

After I finish this school day, I will have a feeling similar to that of conquering a mountain. It's been a busy week, both at school and at home, and I will admit that I have neglected my blog to edit a paper. Don't feel like I've been unfaithful to you. It's just that I have been determined to make my already smart friend sound like a living genius, and I have been wrestling his paper all week to beat it into submission. Oh yes. It's that serious.

Aside from that I have:

• shouted at American Idol on tv (although at least they got it right when they sent Paige home),
• attended a Wednesday night class,
• disrupted a choir practice with my loud soprano and knowledge of the "better" part for a song (with Mer as my cohort in crime),
• offered counseling and advice,
• cried a small river in frustration and confusion over what God is trying to do in me,
• snagged coffee from one of the principals while he was out of the office,
• immediately found him, confessed, and earned myself a free pass for coffee from him any time,
• congratulated Sarah on her "kind of sort of engagement," 
• attempted to sound like a much better writer than I am, and
• eaten Taco Bell no fewer than three times. 

WHEW!  No wonder I'm exhausted!  And I'm sure you are as well after reading my intensive list.  That's all I've got, though, kids.  I've got a paper to piledrive, and only one of us is coming out alive.

Well, you haven't heard from me in several days.  Did you miss me?  I spent some time just plain enjoying my spring break. 

Thursday I went to an AMAZING concert in Houston - Muse.  They had been on my list of top 5 bands to see live in my lifetime, so now I can delightedly check that off (I do love a list).  They played for literally two hours, and at the end I was partially deaf, and glad to be so.  Outstanding. 

I also took some lovely girls from church prom dress shopping and got all Stacy London on them. Example:  "What size?  Okay, just go to the dressing room.  I'll be there with a stack of dresses in 5 minutes."  Why don't people pay me to dress them?  I'm in the wrong profession for sure.

And then I got just plain lazy as soon as Nate finished work for the week.  We did practically nothing and it was absolutely divine.  Slept until we felt like it, got cheap take-out and watched tons of tv and movies.  Normally I'm a pretty antsy kind of girl, and being cooped up in the house drives me insane.  But I was so utterly content to just be with him.  Sorry if you're gagging at this point, but it's the truth...

Oh!  And last night I fell down the stairs at the movies.  I went to walk down, slid down several stairs at the same time (possibly spraining my shin - is that feasible?), and landed in a crouch position (no, not a crotch).  I quickly popped up and turned to Nate, who was directly behind me, and grabbed his coat to tell him all about it. And then I gazed at the incredibly large man whom I was clutching and realized that it was, indeed, not Nate.  I'm fairly certain I a.)scared him enough to pee his pants and b.)caused him to think I was drunk (I wasn't).  It was quite the end to spring break.

So it's back to reality today.  School, gerunds, the whole muckety muck.  After a week of laziness I should be all rested up for it, right?

Definitely not.